One of the fundamental prerequisites of living a life to the full is
actually turning up! As Woody Allen
famously said, "80
percent of success is just showing up".
I would add to that showing up on time. I recently needed
a plumbing job done in my house,
“I’ll come over at 11.00am”, said the plumber.
Needless to say, 11.00am came and went. No plumber and no phone call. After
chasing him for a couple of days,
“Sorry about that. I’ll be over tomorrow at
2.00pm”.
Guess what? No plumber and no phone call. Several
more phone messages later and still no response. Without giving all tradesmen a
bad name, what the hell is going on?? Is it just me asking too much?
I was running a Customer Service course for a
Health Care provider last week and was talking about the critical importance of
delivering products and services on time and yes, I admittedly had a little
rant at some people’s inability to be on time, when one of the delegates
accused me of “nitpicking”, while another said I should lower my expectations
so as not to be disappointed! Can you believe that?
Maybe it’s because of the work I do that I notice more
deficiencies? But I’m sure I’m not the only one who finds it totally
unacceptable. Why is it so difficult for people to be on time?
I was driving to Norwich to visit a friend at the
and I turned the radio on to hear,
“Stay with us after the news when we’ll be talking
about people who are always late….”
This should be interesting, I thought. Sure enough
the first caller exclaimed,
“Yes, I’m always late for everything! I drive my
husband mad!”
And what’s worse she said it with an element of
pride as if it was something to brag about. Clearly her loving husband was not
a priority in her life. This kind of issue can be a “deal breaker” in
relationships. I had a ex girlfriend who, no matter how much time we had to
prepare for an evening out, always contrived to be just a little late. I would
often be in the car waiting while she was still deciding which dress to wear!
Do you know people like this? It is as prevalent in
business relationships as social ones. You know the kind of people who say
they’ll get back to you and never do. They say they’ll ring you back and never
do. They say they’ll e mail you and never do. They fall into the category of
what I call “Flaky”. The kind of people you just know you can’t rely on.
Is it me being a nitpicker or is it hugely
disrespectful of people’s time to be late or not turn up at all?
One of the callers on the radio show said he had
asked one of his best friends to do a reading at his wedding. Guess what? He
missed the reading, I fact he was so late he missed the entire ceremony!
Your time is your most valuable commodity. Please
don’t let others waste it by keeping you endlessly waiting. The essence of
integrity in your social or business life is simple:-
Do what
you say you are going to do, when you say you are going to do it.
Is it just me? Please let me know if you have the
same experiences.
(By the way, the plumber......... yep, still waiting.)
(By the way, the plumber......... yep, still waiting.)
It is easy to justify with all sorts of excuses why you are late, my favourite non-excuse is …. ‘There was traffic on the highway – you know what it’s like, its so unpredictable’ Well its predictably unpredictable and inexcusable, it just tells people they were not really being considered important enough for them to allow time to travel even though they knew the chances of delay were very high.
ReplyDeleteOf course people never say anything, they want to be polite, but the damage has been done and the relationship politely disappears and the late person never realises or learns because they have excused themselves of any responsibility.
Time is something we can control to a much greater extent than we realise only if we take responsibility with integrity.
Stephen Parry
Exactly right Stephen! It`s all about taking responsibility.
DeleteHm. As someone who has a problem with time-keeping (though I ALWAYS do what I say I am going to do in every other respect) I would like to offer you another perspective.
ReplyDeleteI recognised I had a problem and set out to do something about it - alarm clocks, pre-planning, allowing more time, even hypnotherapy. What I realised was that a) that sometimes it was simply a result of being "in the zone" creatively - a good thing in many ways! Solution: I don't allow myself to start on that kind of work when I have an appointment that day. b) sometimes it was a sign that subconsciously I actually didn't want to do something or be somewhere - solution: take more time to consider before agreeing to an appointment - or if it's something unavoidable and unpleasant like a hospital appointment, call on a friend to take me. c) I found I was often late for things I DID want to do - things that were just for me, such as a beauty treatment or a trip to the cinema. As if, deep down, I felt I didn't deserve it. Solution: I commit more to myself these days.
What I'm trying to say is, whilst lateness IS lamentable, it often isn't about someone disrespecting your time. It often isn't about you at all.
That said, in a business capacity, lateness is unprofessional and, funnily enough, I don't have any problem with time-keeping professionally. Though I do always give my time of arrival as "between x and y" to give myself a half hour leeway - just in case!
Thanks Jo! Always good to get a different perspective and stimulate some debate!
DeleteHi Brian,
ReplyDeleteI do hate it when someone wastes my time 'takes my time for granted'. This is because am often times engaged in some worthy employment and would need a very good reason to take a break to attend to something else. Now- such instances are rare and my colleagues know it, so, when I commit such extra-precious time believing that you are worth my undivided attention--plz don't keep me waiting and make no excuses.
Such an experience will make me think of the million important things I would have accomplished within that time if I had stuck to my earlier engagements--and this will make it almost impossible for you to win my trust in years. I VALUE my Time!!
However, I know that I sometimes don't make it in time and maybe I 'waste other people's time and like me they are not very pleased with it.'
Therefore, while we may not always make it in time and may not always intend to be disrespectful to others due to several reasons--we should always make it a point to ensure timely and genuine communication. Call early and say why you won't make it and propose a more suitable time next time. With this, do all you can to keep your word or you could embarrass yourself.
On a more serious note therefore: "I could easily loan you some of my hard earned money than giving you a very precious and irreplaceable amount of my time" (if I feel you might just waste it).
You can always make more money but time is a non-renewable and more valuable resource!!
Liz
You`re right Liz, there is nothing more valuable!
ReplyDelete